Realization
So what was the worst part for poor Martin? Well, it certainly must be the realization. To learn that he was a boy in a man’s body would certainly be a discouraging feeling. He had spent all these years unable to move or sense anything so he never had the chance to grow or progress as a normal human being. You could even say he was trapped inside his own self.
Trapped Forever
Since Martin had been paralyzed like this for such a long time, his progress was not noticed straight away by his family. His dear family was so accustomed to him being absent that they ignored him. They had been convinced that there was no way for Martin to ever recover from his condition. So even if Martin hint them that he had progressed, they would still not see the signs he was showing.
A Doomed Life
Martin soon figured that his fate was doomed. He realized that he was going to be trapped in his own mind, alone and lonely for his whole life. The only company he would ever get would be his own thoughts. His life was set to be doomed from the time he got sick. He was never going to get the chance to meet friends, find love and make a family of his own. He would get a chance to work in electronics…
Ignore Them
So what was a guy to do? Here he was unable to do whatever he wanted, not able to move one arm or even bring himself to blink his eyelids. There was only one thing left for Martin Pistorius to do. His only option was to leave his thoughts behind. He had to turn his mind blank in order to just keep himself from feeling bad about his living condition. Martin soon began to just get himself to become numb.
Not All Under Control
Since he felt helpless and so alone, there was only one solution he could come up with in his mind. If he just kept his mind blank, then in a way he could become less disappointed in how he was. He allowed himself to dissolve in the darkness and vanish. Unfortunately, there were a lot of things that poor Martin could not control even though he tried his best to maintain how he dealt with himself.
“I Love You…”
To see a boy who cannot speak or move at all left an impression on everyone around Martin. The entire world already had an impression of Martin to be a vegetable, so what did they do? Well, they thought since he cannot react, they could get away with whatever they wanted to do. They would just place him in front of a TV and left him there unattended for hours.